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You know the drill guys, we are a tad busy to post anything, so you get a caption this. And boy is it a good one. Winner gets imaginary high fives and some of my imaginary home made cookies. They are to die for, I imagine. As always, keep the captions classy and not offensive. Have fun with this one, it’s a good one! (A huge thanks to Vanessa (@vrock112 on twitter, go follow!) for suggesting this!). Don’t forget you can follow me on twitter (@bassamdgheim), or the blog account (@RMFootballblog). Kaushik (@_Kaushik7) and Mark (@MadridistaMac)

About the author

Written by Bassam

Anonymous

Xabi: ” Sergio might has the hair, but I get the “pose”, who is boss now, Sergio?…jaja I know I am!”

Sergio: ” with Torres not available for SNT ( why did mister do this to me), at least I get Xabi to stare at”

Pegah

WHAHH? Torres wasnt called up for the SNT?!

Guest

“You guys heard el Niño got cut too.”
http://twitter.com/vrock112 Vanessa G

Thanks for the shout out dude! I have to include my caption, the one that inspired such a glorious post!

“I want my ass to look like that, joder! At least my hair is better”- Sergio Ramos

“Jajaja he will never have an ass as boss as me”-Xabi
http://profile.yahoo.com/Q6Y2K7P4QGJQEH257RF7XMXSZ4 Rích

“Just need to finish sewing up the arm holes then I can send this to Mario Balotelli!”
( http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=erI5dG3_R5E )
maddy

when bassam’s not waxing poetic about ramos’ hair, he’s taking notes from alonso on how to get ramos’ attention
Don

Ramos: So you are not wearing any underwear. Wait….. are you wearing it over your pants??? I was kidding when i called you superman!!!
Mokia

Ramos couldn’t understand why every time he looked at an ass, all he saw was Dani alves’ face
Franklloydwright

Hey madrid, why are you guys being such b****es about the venue for the copa del rey final. show some class and stop being sore losers, brah.

Anonymous

Your right let me call Florentino up right now and get this fixed……………………

Franklloydwright

Thanks, brah. You’re a doll.

Anonymous

We said no once lol. Its your dog of a president that won’t let this go.

5ten

Actually its Athletic Bilbao that want Copa del Rey final at Santiago Bernabeu. Their president is trying his best for that to happen. Especially with fiasco that happened in 2009,

Anonymous

According to AS, Marca, Cadena Ser, Rosell had a meeting with Villar yesterday and again told him BARCELONA wanted the final at the SB.

5ten

So let me get this straight. You don’t believe what Marca and AS writes about Madrid but when its about Barca you do. Yip that how it seems.

Anywho I get my info off Biblabo official website, not tabloid Spanish papers.
Anonymous

No, I don’t think Marca is credible anymore, but I do trust (to some extent) Cadena Ser and El Confidencial who also reported your President’s insistence. Regardless if he did or not, you and Bilboa have pushed this too far imo, be gracious, the house owners do not want to host you..
5ten

I really thought all this was laid to rest after Pep said what he said.
Anonymous

I thought it was laid to rest when Real Madrid said “no”.
Yousuf

You guys are arguing over something so stupid. We have construction due at that time anyways. So its not happening ahah. Whether we want it or not, its not happening
Yazan

Santiago Bernabeau is a respectable stadium and we don’t want scum there. Madrid is always the team that gives and Barcelona always takes. Like Guti said we are gentlemen but why does Madrid always have to give? The time for us conceding to Barcelona and giving them what they want has to be over. Spain must return to being fair. If we can’t stop referees from sucking their dicks, then we are going to do whatever we can to make things fair and retaliate against them not allowing us to play in Camp Nou in 2004.

Anonymous

Why are you clowns so obsessed with our home ground? The people of the Bernabeu don’t want you there, have some self respect and put a sock in it.

Irritating douches..

Franklloydwright

Don’t want *us* there? *My* dog of a president? When you assume things you make an ass out of u and me, brah. I’m Frank Lloyd Wright and I’m making an opinion from the vantage point as an outsider about you being a sore loser, brah. I want to stop reading in the periodicals about Madrid whining about something.

Anonymous

I don’t give a rat’s ass who you are, BRAH..

Get your head out of your ass, Real Madrid already said no once, we don’t owe anyone a justification. It’s the other side who are continuously demanding OUR turf be used for THEIR final, it’s not our problem.

Stop moaning and bitching at RMFB, take your quarrel with whatever “periodicals” you read, you imbecile.

Franklloydwright

Be polite brah, maybe turn off your computer and stop fuming on the internet. Kisses
Anonymous

eat it, Brah
Saint Iker

I’ll put an end to this debate

1. Both teams will boo the Spanish National Athem, like they did when they met in 20092. Barcelona refused to host the final in 2004 when RM played Zaragoza3. 1997 when Barcelona won at the Bernabeu they blasted their club anthem though the Bernabeu speakers4. Fans claiming they will celebrate on RMs fountain, Cibeles

So don’t talk about ”class” unless it’s the lack of
5ten

?? You obviously don’t know your Spanish football history??
http://www.realmadridfootballblog.com Corey

Usually I would say dont feed the troll, but your the one that is trolling here. Cut it out.
Anonymous

I expected nothing better from you, Corey
Yazan

Corey, you’re not being fair to boeder. Franklloydwright is attacking us, you are taking his side here it seems. It’s clear who is trolling and it’s not boeder.
daryl

let’s say alot of posters here try too hard to act classy.

http://www.realmadridfootballblog.com Corey

Frank Lloyd Wright was an architect and he is dead. Nice try guy.

mokia

BRAH!! Welcome to junior high Brah!

Hinotame

We dont allow piss ants in or near the cathedral…thats why.
Yazan

are you serious? in 2004 camp nou was forbidden for us, while we gave barcelona bernabeau in 96 (or 98 can’t recall which year) and you had to do your insults. Barcelona is obsessed with us and has always been obsessed with us. We wanted to respect our rivals and our rivals to respect us, but you Catalans don’t like that environment and that’s why your pep “the hypocrite” guardiola always stirs up tensions (remember not handing the ball to ronaldo, and remember his fu**** up press conference in which he straight out hinted he’s going to bribe the refs and there’s nothing we can do). Santiago Bernabeau is not a venue for scum
Anonymous

The day you could control your clubs decision come here to moan about ours. We have never been under the notion that our club is righteous. Our club has been in this business for a century and i think it is a business decision not an act of vendetta. Your club is also trying to malign us for their business interests. Media has its own business interests… trolls like you, do have a purpose… promoting business interests of others without even knowing… but here at rmfb we hate such characters and don’t get disturbed a lot… so troll somewhere else.

5ten

THAT A**
Jean

I think the last few days have been very tense in this blog. We need something to cheer up this place.
What about this video http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ezpFrLWOuDs, or this one:) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p5A2n775Iak, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pWe_lwegpHk&feature=related

http://profile.yahoo.com/Q6Y2K7P4QGJQEH257RF7XMXSZ4 Rích

“OH BARCELONA ARE SUCH CHEATERS” way to reduce tension there…
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fw3jyXJL59o

mokia

Lol yes Forgive Jean for stating the obvious.

http://profile.yahoo.com/Q6Y2K7P4QGJQEH257RF7XMXSZ4 Rích

Forgive me for stating the obvious too..?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LQvQFT_Z5Y0
It’s amazing how you can portray a team with a selectively edited youtube video…

Carvivlie

Xabi: “I’m sexy and I know it” Ramos: “I work out”

http://real.theoffside.com/ Bassam

Wiggle wiggle wiggle
wiggle
wiggle yeaaah!

http://twitter.com/_kaushik7 Kaushik

@5b5ec072e7853838cd7d80c96adfc174:disqus you hit @Bassamd:disqus ’s soft spot there

Anonymous

ramos, “GOD DAMN TROLLS!! Now i know where they come from!
http://real.theoffside.com/ Bassam

It’s really simple. You see a troll, ignore him. Don’t stoop to his level.

Yazan

I respect that Bassam. But we really do concede a lot for fucking Barca fans. We are the diplomatic ones trying to create a gentleman’s competition but they have gone too far lately.

http://twitter.com/_kaushik7 Kaushik

Doesn’t mean we change though. And we keep insisting that we don’t catch bait and warn Madridistas because you are the lot that we want returning to the site, not the trolls.
http://real.theoffside.com/ Bassam

yes and if you give us the chance, we can just delete the comment. But when you respond, with lack of manners, then deleting the comment makes no sense

OkCorral

Sergio: Man if Torres had an ass like that he’d still be bossing it in the Premier League.

WangFengLei

o my gawd LoL

James

My lineup for Rayo game:
Casillas
Arbeloa Pepe Ramos Marcelo
Khedira Alonso
Granero
Ozil Ronaldo
Higuain

Granero will push up when we attack to make it a 4-2-3-1. I’m wondering whether it’s going to be Kaka or Granero, I prefer Granero though. What do y’all think?

Anonymous

hi james, didnt you say some posts or games ago that you prefer kaka to play alongside ozil, that way he helps relieve him and give him space. so whats your thinking about gran. am just asking and would like to know bruv

James

I only like Kaka and Ozil when we are at home. The pitch is larger and we seem to play at a higher tempo. These factors all help Kaka become more successful, since his close control isn’t the greatest and he likes to break forward at a high speed. This Rayo game will probably be the opposite of that; the pitch is small and Rayo will most likely defend with 10 men behind the ball and pressure us in the midfield. I feel like Granero is more suited for this environment, he’s more calm on the ball than Kaka and plays better possession football. Also, a report on Marca suggested Mou was angry with Kaka’s performance against CSKA, although I question this source’s validity.

Anonymous

Good points u make. I read rayo r the best team in the league in the interception stats, go figure. I look forward to how mou will counter that. Any thoughts ?

James

I think we’ll play alot more long balls. Alonso will be important with his long passim abilities. I just hope he doesn’t get marked out of the game by Michu.

Anonymous

Maybe someone can enlighten me on the credibility of this source, Ecodiario is claiming that Sanitas doctors have yet to identify Angel Di Maria’s injury and that he may well be out for the rest of the season!!!
http://ecodiario.eleconomista.es/futbol/noticias/3771709/02/12/Alerta-en-el-Real-Madrid-Di-Maria-y-su-riesgo-a-decir-adios-a-la-temporada.html

Also, Nuri Sahin has been named in Turkey squad, this clearly suggests that he is NOT injured (it will be interesting if he actually plays) which brings up the question: WHY is he not getting minutes. with RM?

5ten

Seriously Madrid needs a new medical team. I love was watching Di Maria with Argentina atleast sad if true.
Yousuf

He has the stomache flu… or something. That doesnt exactly take him out of the squad for more then a few days.

5ten

Boeder your border line on getting on Corey’s nerves similar situation I’m in.
Som

sergio : ” omg !!!! is that a muffin … or a hot cross bun … wait wait wait it is xabi’s bum !!!! “
http://profile.yahoo.com/Q6Y2K7P4QGJQEH257RF7XMXSZ4 Rích

“Can’t believe I just dropped my bib, I BET they let Xabi hold the liga trophy on the bus this year…!”
Anonymous

Ramos- “Iker Casillas, looks oh so temptin’. Sara I ain’t never seen an ass like that. Every time I see that show on Canal my pee pee goes. Doing, doing, doing.

“The way you shake it, I can’t believe it. I ain’t never seen an ass like that. The way you move it, you make my pee pee go. Doing, doing, doing”
http://www.facebook.com/mohanad.aljibreen Ned Jibreen

-Conspiracy theorist Ramos-

Xabi’s bum: “rrring rring”

Ramos : ” I heard ashley cole did it…but Alonso??!…it must be an EPL effect.. 0_0″
Anonymous

Joselu called up, Sahin is apparently injured. Viral gastreoenteritis which I think means he has been shot in the stomach

Anonymous

Bwahahahahahahahahahaha

http://real.theoffside.com/ Bassam

Joselu got called up to the game, with Sahin being left behind. Morata didn’t wait to respond though, as he scored two for Castilla (one wrongly disallowed after a brilliant chip). Castilla got a draw (2-2), but remain top of the table by a good margin.

Safwat Karim

I think Jose doesnt like Morata (:

http://real.theoffside.com/ Bassam

His explanation to why Joselu was chosen over Morata was a tad odd. He mentioned that Morata has been playing as a winger while Joselu as a forward, which is way off. Morata has been playing in the middle right behind Joselu (since Joselu doesn’t have the ball skills to play a deeper role).

Anyways, Morata played as a forward today and did fairly well. His game has become more rounded this year. He has 10 goals and 5 assists so far (Joselu has 13 in more games) .

Slamjack

I think Jose want Morata to help Castilla and look he scored. And Joselu have perfect record in first team when came on sub, 2 goal in 2 appearance. He is more older and matured than Morata and he is Castilla top scorer so why not give him a chance. Morata still young and have more time and chance later.

Saint Iker

Ramos: ”No way, it can’t be… he has a….. TAIL! Xabi is a….SAIYAN!”

Xabi; (who intended to scream for 20 minutes and power up, decided to give up after struggling to put on his vest) ”F*ck this sh*t! I’m out! Don’t be grabbing my tail Sergio”…..
http://madridistamac.blogspot.com Madridista Mac

“oohh lah, lah – If i had an ass like that I’d surely beat Ronaldo as the team’s coverboy for Thong Magazine!” -Ramos

Hahahaha

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